It’s a New Day, a New Dawn
For each of us, this transitional time marks an end and a beginning, ushering in a powerful time of the year when we can choose that which stirs our deepest, most conscious yearnings for the journey we find ourselves on. December has always been, for me, a time to go inward and reflect. Often I am more emotional and seek that quiet space that allows me to consider where I have been and how far I have come, have not come. I do so with compassion for myself and gently honour it all.
This year has marked me and many of us significantly. The world as I knew it to be has been rocked to the core and so, sometimes, I struggle with feelings of vulnerability and powerlessness. What looms large in our world now is messy, scary and disheartening and I ask for clarity and understanding as I move forward. What I know to be true is that the powerlessness I feel sits around not being able to ease the fear that marginalized people out there must feel at this unsettling time in history. What I also know to be true is that I am not powerlessness to control what moves inside of me, and in fact, is the only thing I do have control over. So this is my work, every day. Observing self, my thought forms, emotions, fears and questions, allowing them each space inside of me to take shape while at the same time knowing that they too, are not static and organically evolving as I do. I am grateful for my current opportunity which allows me the solitude within an incredible natural landscape on an edge where land and sea meet, to ponder and consider all that shows up, sometimes crashing and other times like a slow rolling tide. What I return to again and again is to stay grounded and in love.
Recently I had lunch with a friend of many years, someone who has graced my life so lovingly for over 40 years now and who I may not see for many years at a time. Tyrone was the main architect of California’s wind energy policy, among other things, and he and I worked together prior to that at New Alchemy in Massachusetts. He quoted a friend of his at some point during our hours together, “If you don’t have a practice, you don’t have a chance.” This resonated for me as I found, and still find, myself in deep process over the changing world we live in and the changing body that I am. Having a practice is having a path to the person that I am, the place where I am at.
It does not matter the practice one chooses as a practice is something personal and unique to every human. What matters is that you find a way to access that place inside of you where you can return to whenever you require guidance, peace, when you need to gather strength or, simply, to remember. I think, more than ever, that the ‘remembering’ is crucial, to remember that we came from love, that we are love and that it is a requirement for all of us. Love is who we are and why we are here. There are as many methods to accessing the deep knowing inside as there are people on the earth. There are tried and true methods that many people adopt which may or may not provide the desired results for you. What do you desire? This too is different for each of us and so should the practice not speak to the desire? Your journey is your own and there is no finish line. My ways to be in connection may not seem ‘conventional’ to someone else but they work for me. More important than believing there is a right way is to remain open and find your own way.
The practice’s that work for me are the ones that I carry with me and access in every moment. They are about presence and awareness and holding space for it within my daily interactions as I move through my life. Instead of setting aside a special time in which to become present within myself, I exercise the ability to remain there through the messiness and uncertainty of life. One of the reason’s I choose this method is that it is always there to guide me in each moment while also allowing me to self-observe and in this way I strengthen my practice and self-regulate on a regular basis. It is always there for me. My practice provides my life with a richness that colours my world in ways that never cease to amaze me. You will know when you have found what works for you because it will resonate inside and small shifts in the landscape of your life will make themselves known.
In the days and years ahead I think we will all need to feel some control over our innermost thoughts all the tricks our minds can play, the havoc they can wreak. Learning to go inside and access the body, the feeling body where our true wisdom lives, will be our greatest strength. It will be from that place of grounded stregnth that will allow us as individuals to reach out in love and solidarity to assist others in times of need.
I wish for everyone to have peace in their hearts and love in their life.